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Why I'm Mad Today: Lame Movies.
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Obligatory Linkage: BlackChampagne.com- Without his site, my site would never have existed.
NinjaBurger-
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Well, I skipped yet another update and the net result was one of my site's busier days of all time. I had
6 visits, of which I can only name three of them. I think that the pretty picture that I had on the
last update might have been a contributing factor. At any rate, yes I skipped another one, and if anyone
who is reading this (other than my wife) really cares, shoot me an email to let me know how disappointed
you were, perhaps I will feel for you and soldier on, even on days when I really just don't give a damn.
Don't hold your breath.
There are three contributing factors to my missing an update yesterday. 1) I played way to much
of the damn 'Deadly Rooms of Death' game. 2) With the obvious exception of 'South Park', Fox's
Sunday evening shows, King of the Hill, the Simpsons and Malcolm in the middle are the only reason
anyone should ever watch network television (unless you get addicted to 'Survivor' like I did, in which
case you can watch an hour of CBS on Thursday). 3) I watched a movie that my wife had rented on DVD, which
I will likely bitch a lot about later.
The good news on the DROD front is that I have learned all of the necessary tactics to win nearly
every board with ease. The even better news is that this has resulted in me not enjoying it quite as
much as I did when I started, and as such had no clue how to play or what the hell was going on.
The net result of that is that when I enter a new board I will scan it for a minute or two, come up
with the solution and then play it through. Sometimes the playing it through can take thousands of
moves, literally, and that becomes a tad boring. I think I will go ahead and complete my current level
and then give it up. Much like Tetris, this game loses all of the enjoyment once you know all of the
rules and the boards become more tedious than actually challenging. Hell, at least Tetris forces
you to move faster the further you progress..
As far as Fox's Sunday night line-up goes, it was pretty good this week and kept me watching. I think
it is a solid fact that pretty much any show they put on after 'The Simpsons' is going to do really
well in its time slot, but 'Malcolm in the Middle' is a rather amusing show. Perhaps I only think
that because my mother has taken to believe that I am Malcolm, while the older brother who is away (I forget
his name) is my oldest brother, and Reece(sp?) is the middle brother, who was always causing trouble
just for the sake of causing trouble. As far as that little equasion goes my mother did pull of a pretty
good 'insane mother', back in the day, while my father was never so subserviant as the father in
the show, but it certainly paints a better picture of a real family than say 'Full House' for example.
• UnderWorld
Thankfully I did not have to pay theatre price for this movie. I watched it even after reading the
horrible review that Flux over at
BlackChampagne.com gave it. It was every bit as horrible as he said.
My biggest bitch about the movie is also one of my 'pet peeves' when it comes to films. Ammunition.
You can either take the Hollywood approach, that is that you never run out of bullets, ever. Or you
can take the 'real life' approach where both sides have to reload. You simply can not mix those two
without making the movie seem absolutely fake. This movie even goes so far as to show you the clip
that is being used in the 'semi-automatic' gun, which is conveniently 'fully-automatic' when it is
necessary. Though the clip is mostly empty when you see it, you can deduce that it could only hold
eight or nine more rounds, for a total of thirteen or fourteen, at best. Yet, the hand-guns are
routinely fired sixty+ times, then they stop to reload. Come on..
Then there is the issue about Selene, she can be all-powerful, when necessary. She can be as fragile as
a 300 year old tea service also, when necessary. She can beat the shit out of a dozen of the werewolves,
yet can't seem to open her own nail polish. It just seemed so fake.
As far as the 'plot twist' at the end of the movie, if you didn't see it coming by the time you were
a half-an-hour into the movie, you just weren't paying attention.
The movie did take my mind away from real life for about two hours and that is roughly 1% of a
week. By that metric, it only cost a few cents to watch the movie, and I still think I got screwed.
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