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Latest Humorous T-shirt Slogan: "You Wish!" This one has to be taken in context to be appreciated. The girl wearing this belly shirt was maybe 5'0" tall, with a muffin top going on, despite the fact that she was clearly in her third trimester of pregnancy. In addition she was wearing a thong that came up past her low-rise jeans and pushed her muffin top down over the edge to really emphasize the roll. I'm not in perfect shape so I don't expect that others should be, but when you are wearing that shirt, along with the rest of the outfit, you open yourself to scrutiny (and perhaps random looks of horror).
It's fun to hate:
When Shadowtwin reigns supreme:
Your Horoscope: Sagitarius: 11/22-12/21 A typographical error in your Church's newsletter will lead to you performing sex acts on dozens of anonymous strangers in your pursuit of "oral highground." Capricorn: 12/22-1/19 The stars did recently tell your wife to "listen to her heart" regarding whether or not she should leave you. The stars did not intend for you to listen to her heart. But once you used that bonesaw on her sternum (not trusting the stethoscope which just responded with a cryptic thumping sound), we're pretty sure she made up her mind anyway. Aquarius: 1/20-2/18 The stars would like to apologize for stating in their last prophecy, "Be wary of the stranger you meet at beach this weekend. The stars aren't sure why, but they don't trust him." Through a cosmic hiccup, that information was supposed to be released this month. The August prophecy should have read, "A dark and handsome stranger will approach you on the beach, profess his love for you, and sweep you away for a jetset marriage. After which you will lead a long, happy, prosperous, healthy life as the Queen of a small island nation." We apologize for any inconvenience this error may have caused. Pisces: 2/19-3/20 Your new stopwatch will allow you to time how long you can hold your breath underwater down to the thousandth of a second. Unfortunately, poor planning will mean that you are not able to actually share the information with anyone. Aries: 3/21-4/19 Your innovative new device for beauticians to use while giving pedicures can be wildly successful and make you quite wealthy IF you change the name. Trust us, no one is going to buy a "Ped-O-File". Taurus: 4/20-5/20 Your Mother always told you to wear clean underwear just in case there was an accident and paramadics had to see them. But as you board that plane today, the stars want you to know that you needn't worry about it. The debris field will be more than 8 square miles, making it impossible to find most human remains. Not to mention that the ensuing fire burned so hot that it disintegrated not only all fabric, but most of the thin metals aboard as well. Gemini: 5/21-6/21 You just had to get that genital piercing, didn't you? The stars tried to warn you not to, but you went ahead and did it anyway... Now all your worst fears will come to bear when, at a campground this weekend, you run afoul of this guy: Cancer: 6/22-7/22 The less traveled by areas of the Grand Canyon's north rim offer some of the most breathtaking views of this natural wonder. You will soon find out they also include some of the worst footings and none of the handrails. They do, however, provide equally awe-inspiring, terminal velocity impacts. Leo: 7/23-8/22 The stars heard your pleas, begging for someone who you could share your love with and embrace for the rest of your life. If you are still single, throw your arms around the closest person to you at 3:44pm GMT on Dcember 9th -That'll be the one. Trust us, you won't have time to be picky... Virgo: 8/23-9/22 The stars have piled up most of your things on the front porch. You can stay at a friend's house, but you aren't coming back home until you admit what you did and apologize. The stars' Mother was right about you... (you must have really pissed them off; the stars were in tears while they told me this) Libra: 9/23-10/22 The stars have been doing a little thinking and a lot of math. The population of planet earth is roughly 6,796,590,704. That means that roughly 566,382,558 people share each astrological sign. About 18,620,796 have the same birthday. Based on average life expectancy as many as 248,277 people were born on the same day, in the same year, for every zodiac sign. How can one statement possibly predict the future of all of them? Ehh, fuck it. "A full moon while Venus is rising is an omen of good things to come." Scorpio: 10/23-11/21 They say you never know how you are going to react to a crisis. After a home invasion this weekend you will: You will scream, "Do whatever you want to my wife, but leave me alone!" You will then create a distraction by throwing your newborn at the assailant as you dive through the window to safety. Now you know. Music lost to history: Aerosmith - Dream On When I started doing these, I could never have imagined that I would be putting an Aerosmith song here. Since I was born in 1974, this song is well before my generation. It was recorded in 1972 and released in 1983 on Aerosmith's Self-Titled Album, but to read the information on it at Wikipedia most of us would become familiar with it from a re-release in 1976.
Like most of the music being released in the late 60's/early 70's that was pushing the rock-n-roll envelope, Dream
On relies heavily on solid composition and and melody. Before the era of the modern effects processor, these bands
had no distortion to hide behind (or very little), and synthesized instruments hadn't yet made their way into music. In
that way the music always sounds more raw to us today because, quite simply, it was. While it seems laughable to think
about today, music like this was so far removed from the bubble-gum pop of the 50's that it still wasn't accepted into the
mainstream. As the baby-boomers became the target demographic, the rock-n-roll movement really started to pick up speed,
with bands like Led Zeppelin and Aerosmith clearing the path for the much darker and heavier bands like Black
Sabbath.
While I (and most of my generation) are probably far more familiar with the Aerosmith of the late 80's and early 90's, the
reason this song makes it onto my MLtH page comes down to one thing: Age. Not necessarily the age of the song; In fact,
as I sat down to do the research for this today, I had no idea when it was released, but would have guessed (closely) the
mid 70's. Tyler was born March 26, 1948, meaning that this song was written when he was only 24 years old. I'm not sure
why, but I have always thought this song was pretty amazing given his age at composition. I suppose it is human nature to
wax poetic about the days of yore and the imminent passage of time, but the melody sets a mood that makes you feel it
right along with him. As the song nears the end and his lyrics become more more frenzied, you can almost feel the pain
(longing?) in his voice. Listen to it with headphones and no distraction sometime, you'll see what I mean.
I wrote a short bit some time ago about Kelly Sweet's cover of this
song (see the video on Youtube). While I have since gotten over
the initial hatred I felt towards the cover of the song, I still just can't like it. The words are there; she hits the
notes; but I just can't hear it in her voice. As if there is somthing very personal about the song and Tyler's
deliverance of the lyrics that just can't be duplicated. At least to me.
That said, I have heard Aerosmith doing the song with an orchestra, and it also seems to lack the passion of the original.
So perhaps the thing that I like so much about it is the under-produced, raw sound of it, or it may be that I am still
hearing it through the ears of that impressionable youth that heard if for the first time in a dusty old Van with my Uncle
Art. Either way, it seems it is Lost to History.
I Can't Believe it's Not Porn! WhorePresents.comYep, it's not porn. It's not a site with gifts for sale either, which is probably a good thing since I can't imagine that any woman would be at all flattered to get a gift -no matter how nice- in a box that says "Whore Presents.com" on it.
Daily Reading:
My reading list changes from time to time, and there are many sites that I visit that are not on the list.
They are listed in the order that I visit them, enjoy!
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The Mookie
I spent a long time debating whether or not to sign up for The Mookie last night. Why? The new episode of South Park that was on last night was about World of Warcraft. See, my wife and I have an addiction to a very similar game, and I absolutely had to watch it with her. So when I signed up, I knew I needed to be done in two hours -hell making it two hours in a blogger tourney is a pretty impressive feat.
I actually did pretty well, and was still around as it was nearing the second hour. I was about the middle of the pack with 15 or so remaining when the episode of South Park started, so I was between the bedroom and the pc trying to watch it and play my hands. Eventually I just called a couple of pushes (one with A-7 one with K-5) and busted out in 12th. With the people still remaining in the tournament it was going to take some ideal play, mixed with lucky cards to make it to the money anyway. I am really happy with my play overall, and next week maybe I can set aside more than two hours, just in case I happen to get deep again. Anyway, I got into a hand fairly early on that led Alcanthang to call me a donkey, so I just wanted to throw it up here and see if I can get an opinion or two on how donkey-ish my play was. I am in early position with K-Jo. I am going to try to limp into the pot with K-Jo most of the time anyway, maybe I raise if I am on the button and no one is in it, but in this situation limping from EP is my choice. It folds to Al, who is on the button, and he limps as well. Since he limped from the button, I am not putting him on much of a hand here, possibly king or queen high or a suited two gapper. Flop comes up Q-10-6 rainbow, giving me the OESD. I want to take another card for sure, barring an insanely large bet, so I check it. If I was on the button here, and it was checked around to me, I would bet it. In this case I checked because I wanted to see the next card as cheaply as possible. With the range of hands I was putting Al on, I figured he could have paired any card on the board so I was fairly sure he was going to bet. Had I bet, he would likely have raised, and with a drawing hand I am not sure if I call a raise. Al makes a pot-sized bet (210 at the time) which I call. I figure his best hand right now is a Q-x, meaning that any Ace, nine, or king puts me ahead. I call the bet with what I believe to be 11 outs (15 if he had limped with a low PP that didn't connect). If I don't hit, I am going to have to lay them down on the turn. The turn card is an ace, giving me the straight. But I figure he has me on a drawing hand so if I bet into it he may fold. I check to him and he bets 600 (pot being 630). I reraise him my last 490, he calls and flips over QJo. I take down the hand. Then he calls me donkey. He goes on to say that my call was foolish because he was 2-1 on the flop. Now even if I knew what he was holding, which I obviously didn't, though I did figure he had paired either the Queen or the 10, I don't think he was nearly that far ahead. Even if I did know what he was holding, with 11 outs and 2 cards to come, I think I make that call on the flop. If I had missed it on the turn and he bet 600, I would have probably layed it down, but on the flop with a two way straight draw and a lot of outs, I don't see how you can lay that hand down. Cardplayer.com shows the odds on the flop to look like this: So, was my call of the pot-sized (210) bet on the flop a donkey call? Honestly I would like to know if it was. I don't think I will quit making that call even if it was, but I am curious to know if it was really such a bad call. And for those of you who get all hot and squishy when you see hand histories, here is that as well: Full Tilt Poker Game #1067991210: The Mookie - DuggleMoney (7197813), Table 5 - 30/60 - No Limit Hold'em - 22:37:53 ET - 2006/10/04 Seat 1: Patchmaster (2,625) Seat 2: garthmeister (2,140) Seat 3: AlCantHang (2,490) Seat 4: on_thg (1,880) Seat 5: jjok (1,360) Seat 6: SurfKiller (3,230) Seat 7: shadowtwin (1,360) Seat 8: DontKnow (3,185) Seat 9: RoccoBoxer (2,425) on_thg posts the small blind of 30 jjok posts the big blind of 60 The button is in seat #3 *** HOLE CARDS *** Dealt to shadowtwin [Ks Jd] SurfKiller folds shadowtwin calls 60 DontKnow folds RoccoBoxer folds Patchmaster folds garthmeister folds AlCantHang calls 60 on_thg folds jjok checks *** FLOP *** [Ts 6d Qh] jjok checks shadowtwin checks AlCantHang bets 210 jjok folds shadowtwin calls 210 *** TURN *** [Ts 6d Qh] [Ac] shadowtwin checks AlCantHang bets 600 shadowtwin raises to 1,090, and is all in AlCantHang calls 490 shadowtwin shows [Ks Jd] AlCantHang shows [Js Qc] *** RIVER *** [Ts 6d Qh Ac] [8c] shadowtwin shows a straight, Ace high AlCantHang shows a pair of Queens AlCantHang: donkey shadowtwin wins the pot (2,810) with a straight, Ace high *** SUMMARY *** Total pot 2,810 | Rake 0 Board: [Ts 6d Qh Ac 8c] Seat 1: Patchmaster didn't bet (folded) Seat 2: garthmeister didn't bet (folded) Seat 3: AlCantHang (button) showed [Js Qc] and lost with a pair of Queens Seat 4: on_thg (small blind) folded before the Flop Seat 5: jjok (big blind) folded on the Flop Seat 6: SurfKiller didn't bet (folded) Seat 7: shadowtwin showed [Ks Jd] and won (2,810) with a straight, Ace high Seat 8: DontKnow didn't bet (folded) Seat 9: RoccoBoxer didn't bet (folded) ArchivesJune 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 July 2007 October 2007 December 2007 February 2008 August 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 July 2009 August 2009 October 2009 November 2009 Site design was stolen directly from Blackchampagne.
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